Monday, April 20, 2009

Besides May Flowers, A Few Other Things April Showers Bring


Wet socks

Black mold

Clogged sewers

Hair that makes you look like a rejected skank from Bret Michaels: Rock of Love Bus

Broken umbrellas

Clinical depression

Stagnant pools of water that will soon reopen as breeding grounds for horny mosquitoes

Pollen

Flash floods

Rainbows


OK, obviously, I'm a little tired today, so sorry about this one. I guess this is what happens when I stay up late watching My Big Redneck Wedding on CMT. What was I thinking? I need a a shower and some medication.

On another note, if you haven't already, please vote to put me, Kelcey, Christy, Jessica and Anna on the agenda for BlogHer 2009 for our panel DYING IS EASY, COMEDY IS HARD. You just have to register with the BlogHer site, then click on the link at the top of the page that reads "I would attend this session." (Even if you're not certain you're going, this is just to put us on the schedule.) Polls close May 1, so thanks for any help you can give us.

And, not to spoil the surprise we're planning for the panel, but know that Kelcey and I have been working on our "Cocktail" routine, in which we throw vodka bottles at each other's heads to the tune of "Hippie, Hippie Shake." Trust me, you won't want to miss it. (We're thisclose to being able to do it without helmets!)












16 comments:

Cheryl Prater said...

You should rename that link:

"Dying is Easy, Voting for Wendi, Kelcey, Christy, Jessica and Anna on the BlogHer site is slightly more difficult than learning Japanese."

Sheesh.

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

You forgot the endless drippings of snot filled noses.

And I have never heard of a better reason to attend a panel than bottles of liquor hurtling through the air at people's heads. You should be in advertising.

Marinka said...

April is the cruelest month. The IRS made sure of that.

Cat said...

i'm going to vote right now because where there are flying liquor bottles, there i'll be, if only in spirit.

Anonymous said...

I'm tired because I stayed up late (10:00pm!) to watch the Bret Michaels Rock of Love Bus reunion show. Bring on the bad hair, blontourage, fake ta tas, and scarily adept pole dancing ninnys. Mommy loves her some guilty pleasure.

WA said...

I also watched the ROLB reunion show last night, so maybe that's another reason I had trouble sleeping. "Six figures, bitch. Six fig-ures!"

hokgardner said...

I'm curious - how are you and Kelcey rehearsing throwing vodka bottles at each other when you live thousands of miles apart?

Ann's Rants said...

I thought you were going to say you two came up with a specially themed cocktail for the panel. Will you guys get on that?

Thanks.

*Akilah Sakai* said...

Marinka, I must agree.

We had tornado watches all over the damn place last night! My son is not handling the pollen well at all. Even his face is breaking out despite meds.

So that's why mosquitos fly up summer dresses. They're horny bastards! Grossness.

Sharon said...

Logged in, voted, clicked on would like to present with you and would come down and stalk you if wasn't on the "suspicious canadian wearing tube socks" list of travellers going into the u.s.

Lisa (Jonny's Mommy) said...

Yeah, well, watching My Big Redneck Wedding would kill a few brain cells. But the post was still funny! I'll get over to vote for ya'll (I like pretending I'm from the south. I'm not at all, of course. Can't you tell by the horrible accent?!)

StephanieG said...

Ok, so you think it wasn't hard enough for me to turn down BlogHer in the Windy city this summer, with my little sister just a suburb away? Now you gotta go throw in some vodka AND a Hippie Hippie Shake?

Help a sister out, won't ya?

bernthis said...

all that is why I hate summer.

MadMad said...

This is why I watch Murder, She Wrote... it doesn't keep ya' up, much.

Belle said...

You, Kelcey and Tom Cruise.

the mama bird diaries said...

I kind of miss the media obsession around West Nile Virus.

I can't wait to hippie hippie shake with you. And then go marry Tom Cruise.