Sunday, August 03, 2008
Besides $2 For Water, A Few Other Things You'll Now Have To Pay For On US Airways
Seat Belt:
$4.00
Tray Table:
$5.00
Seat Cushion:
$3.00
Seat Cushion That Doesn't Smell Like Richard Simmons' Armpits:
$5.00
Token For The Restroom:
$.50
Toilet Paper For The Restroom:
$1.50/square (where available)
Courtesy Heads Up That Your Knee Is About To Be Whacked By The Food Cart:
$2.75
Bag Of Ice To Reduce Swelling On Knee That Was Just Whacked By The Food Cart:
$7.50
Greeting From A Flight Attendant:
$6.00
Pleasant Greeting From A Flight Attendant:
$12.50
Oxygen Mask In The Event Of An Emergency:
$3.00
Activation of Oxygen Mask In The Event Of An Emergency:
$39.00
Barf Bag:
Due To Overwhelming Respect For Our Customers, This Item Is Still Free Of Charge
Barf Bag Disposal:
$155.00 (where available)
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21 comments:
How about a cup in which to drink your $2 water? An extra $1.
I recently flew on the European airline Ryan Air, where the seats DO NOT RECLINE. Not for an extra fee, not for the first 10 rows, nada. The seats do not have the mechanical ability to recline. Buh-bye!
Geez.. I know how you feel!
That's why we're flying Jetblue tomorrow.
I hate airlines and flying onw. Not because of any fear of flying, but it's just such a ridiculous, expensive hassle. Remember when flying was fun?
Snort!
As Minivan Mom says she has no fear of flying...I'm scared of the costs that never seem to end...grrr
Belt extender: $4.00
my recent trip to and from (horrible, horrible) wedding adventure was fun filled with 4 flights on AirTran. Not an amazingly fun experience...
5$-3 oz. soda of your choice, 8$-ridiculously small bag of salty pretzels,
(shit, i already drank my 3 oz? OMG! i'm gonna die of dehydration!)
Free-ear buds for XM satellite radio?
10$-over zealous, completely flaming, steward... umm.. male, gay male ...flight attendant..
very amusing...
anyways, some jerk was in my seat and refused to move.. so, i got moved into a different seat.. (no big deal) ...until a week or so after our flight... they reimbursed us the 286$ for the ticket.
Not complaining... but weird, considering you have to pay for extra baggage...
but hey! you get to keep your lighters now, i guess they've decided confiscating 60,000 lighters a day isn't quite as important as confiscating drugs, knives, guns, BOMBS, fingernail clippers, nail files...
(did someone say BOMB??!?!?)
Oh you kill me - I love the cart one!
ain't it the truth... we are going to California in a couple of weeks and I dread the flying part.
I'm with minivan mom, I remember when flying was fun. Now it just sucks from beginning to end.
Plus, sometimes you have to sit next to snickering homophobes.
The last time I flew was in March, and it took me 12 hours to get from Albany, NY to here (total flying time was just over 5 hours), including a four-hour stop over at JFK where I accidentally sat next to a dead rat. It's going to be a long time before I fly again, and I'll pay whatever it costs to avoid JFK.
TOO FUNNY! Thx for the belly laugh!
Surly row companions who do nothing but complain about how the airline industry sucks are still free, too!
Telling them perhaps they reason they are not getting good service is because they are an ass: priceless
God Forbid I need a hug. How much you think that would go for?
Unbelievable.
I take it you just took a trip. Sounds as though you had oodles of fun on the flight. Can't wait to hear the details.
lol.. good one. How about jetblue's latest. charging $7 for a pillow and blanket! (and full of germs as an added bonus)
priceless.
I honestly think I could deal without most of those things...the seat cover that doesn't smell like Richard Simmon's armpits, however, is essential.
Oh, and if you really want to piss people off pack an elaborate picnic for your trip. Cheese, grapes, crackers--it makes the other suckas crazy. And what fun is flying if you can't do that?
You forgot the biggie! Fee for airline losing your luggage: $firstborn
oversized person hogging your armrest? also still free:(
Thanks for the laugh!
People giving you dirty looks because your kid is kicking the back of thier seat $mysanity.00!!
Crying baby right behind you: $free
Help! I think I have a death wish.
Flights like this do something to me and before I know it I am plumping up a goose down pillow, slipping it into an Egyptian cotton case, unfurling the cashmere blanket, sticking in the earplugs and reclining before unpacking my own special picnic of seafood & champagne with chocolate & espresso coffee for afters (liquids purchased airside).
Seriously. All I used to take before was a book and maybe a pen and paper.
Are travellers like me the real reason sharp objects are no longer permitted in the air?
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